tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-68860808939008470342024-03-05T00:46:36.684-08:00OMG!!Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-19910168737577483362011-06-22T22:25:00.000-07:002011-06-22T22:31:23.113-07:00It's Alright!Admit it: You still love “Saved By The Bell”. There is no shame in this, it was a pretty amazing show. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuD3kuc_1silo0d4bO8l5Gk3cOJh1jMV_X4tKaN1p3VHICLBcPOXUOOWhIKKDHv4X11L2JWdKJBJHHMcmLCHngaWC0JFZDeTCxDk4xvsNC4iKS6AKzqbHqpRabgVX5dIR0kb4pqq9Krf1i/s1600/kelly.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="320" width="215" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuD3kuc_1silo0d4bO8l5Gk3cOJh1jMV_X4tKaN1p3VHICLBcPOXUOOWhIKKDHv4X11L2JWdKJBJHHMcmLCHngaWC0JFZDeTCxDk4xvsNC4iKS6AKzqbHqpRabgVX5dIR0kb4pqq9Krf1i/s320/kelly.png" /></a></div>Recently though, I have been noticing something different while I catch up with Bayside High every morning—Kelly, Jessie, and Lisa look like the hipster girls walking around my neighborhood. I’ve even found myself saying, “I want Lisa’s jacket!” Don’t believe me?<br />
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This is Miss Kelly Kapowski. It looks like she just got through lifeguarding with AC Slater at the Malibu Sands beach club. This looks absolutely appropriate for a lifeguard. I'm sure that high cut is very comfortable while running to save someone while they're drowning. Do I actually hear you liking that suit? That's good because... <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrhMBqULg7NXW_QNMIpUKRjhtSGgAXzXKOgBlsN3XcAZpvlvLoa1Grtq7b01PucHF-3WONmZcLxdtXh4YkG2tX4vMb2CwMdQ5jHuXydN7zaY6glx1uHSEP8WJbUBdHAjnwj7GrMbVLUkwU/s1600/suit.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="320" width="220" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrhMBqULg7NXW_QNMIpUKRjhtSGgAXzXKOgBlsN3XcAZpvlvLoa1Grtq7b01PucHF-3WONmZcLxdtXh4YkG2tX4vMb2CwMdQ5jHuXydN7zaY6glx1uHSEP8WJbUBdHAjnwj7GrMbVLUkwU/s320/suit.png" /></a></div>This is a one piece suit from American Apparel, appropriately named the MALIBU one piece. Coincidence?! I think not, American Apparel! Look around you. Girls are wearing denim print leggings! Keds! SCRUNCHIES! I kid you not, I saw scrunchies at Hot Topic. HOT TOPIC! <br />
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OK, I know what you’re thinking. “Jess, c’mon. It’s a plain one piece! They’ve made those for years!” or “We all know American Apparel is weird!” OK. I see your point and raise you this:<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHTaED_tz00DOe4p_POlmpmmleNklBu5fHjlMg_7t54m4RhaLxTrrv6ZjBMDk1zSf7qBgvKrtsb4_xolRykSHioTw4UWUrS2J8BATqLGKk3Khbf1m8WK4LK6ei5Kp-2bBFSiD-oIN4nec8/s1600/spano3.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="293" width="196" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHTaED_tz00DOe4p_POlmpmmleNklBu5fHjlMg_7t54m4RhaLxTrrv6ZjBMDk1zSf7qBgvKrtsb4_xolRykSHioTw4UWUrS2J8BATqLGKk3Khbf1m8WK4LK6ei5Kp-2bBFSiD-oIN4nec8/s320/spano3.png" /></a></div>This is Jessie Spano. I’m so happy she took time out of her busy O.D.ing-on-caffeine-pills schedule to pose for this picture in this oh-so-Native American inspired jacket. Those shoulder pads! That print! Nobody <i>really</i> likes Jessie Spano. Even her boyfriend AC makes fun of her all the time. Why would we ever— <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPTBRf1Eh007CXRojdSqz2RpWDjbDLgNqnWAbjyPd_Ldr1cqvSHs-FGzqUqV3CC4l4PE8gOD8nCwJg-3tvPsm57murXFNdvqd4HmPvogyCiX7hbx4CxhzfQa0Hnp6KfkbYrT0A5NgdlbI3/s1600/jacket.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="320" width="217" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPTBRf1Eh007CXRojdSqz2RpWDjbDLgNqnWAbjyPd_Ldr1cqvSHs-FGzqUqV3CC4l4PE8gOD8nCwJg-3tvPsm57murXFNdvqd4HmPvogyCiX7hbx4CxhzfQa0Hnp6KfkbYrT0A5NgdlbI3/s320/jacket.png" /></a></div>OH GOD! Urban Outfitters did it too! Urban! I thought you were better than this! Yes, you cater to the hipster crowd. Yes, some things in your store are ugly as hell. One has to wonder if Urban Outfitters got together with the American Apparel people and decided to watch an “I love the 90s” marathon, then just say, “Fuck it! THIS is our collection! Totally awesome!” And then they high fived, held their Zimas up in the air and laughed hysterically.<br />
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As much as I adore Zack Morris, boys, please don't start dressing like he does. I literally know one person who can pull off white High tops. ONE. I love my generation, I really do. I love our sense of humor, irony and weird obsession with looking as unattractive as possible (but I’ll save that for another blog). But can we just admit that we do, in fact, miss the ‘90s like crazy? I do (and I’m planning on buying some of those high waisted, Tawny Kitaen jean shorts. Watch me). Looking throughout history, you will see that eventually, everything does come back. It was only a matter of time until we met again, ‘90s. I just hope that the early 2000’s fashion doesn’t come back, with that white eye shadow and bowling shirts with weird prints. It won’t, right? Right? Oh no. I’m so excited… I’m so… scared.Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-72927289290078179052011-03-14T21:04:00.000-07:002011-03-14T23:33:55.647-07:00Oscars? What Oscars?I’m blaming Charlie Sheen for not writing a blog about the Oscars.<br />
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No, really. Hear me out.<br />
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Can you turn on the TV, read a magazine, go into Hot Topic, log into Facebook, Tweet, play on StumbleUpon, talk to your mom, or even walk down the street without hearing something about Charlie Sheen? No, you can’t. The Academy Awards (aka, my Superbowl) happened just two short weeks ago. Nobody cares anymore. Yeah, Melissa Leo swore during her speech. Christian Bale “forgot” his wife’s name (or did he?... I don’t think he did). Natalie Portman got side swiped by a question about that douchey Dior designer. Is anyone talking about it? No. Not. One. Bit. <br />
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Normally in the few days following the Oscars, I’m online, flipping through magazines, and watching every type of Fashion Police-esque show to see every single dress that I didn’t catch during any if the many pre-shows that I watch. I can’t this year. The Academy Awards were on a Sunday night, by Monday morning all anyone could talk about was “winning”. <br />
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To be honest, I questioned whether or not I should even go about writing this. Is this old news? You know what? I don’t care. These actresses looked amazing, and damn it, I’m going to talk about it.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWnEI5GTRgOlfzr84L3ftZNhJqFiUjwwDP_d875DNHffli0OEaK63wqZcPsGEKfraBE-Re-Fyf2o_m8N4SVo7KgdMDclwSPIYMo2j5ydcI7N3AHQ94a-oFS9RhT5xnCDR5GRl7O1dSIuFn/s1600/jennifer-lawrence-oscars-2011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="300" width="187" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWnEI5GTRgOlfzr84L3ftZNhJqFiUjwwDP_d875DNHffli0OEaK63wqZcPsGEKfraBE-Re-Fyf2o_m8N4SVo7KgdMDclwSPIYMo2j5ydcI7N3AHQ94a-oFS9RhT5xnCDR5GRl7O1dSIuFn/s320/jennifer-lawrence-oscars-2011.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Look at Jennifer Hudson! Even though you can see what I’m pretty sure is a tan line on her boobs, she looks amazing. Probably one of my best dressed of the night(even though I saw three people helping her with the train as she posed for pictures). <br />
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Or Jennifer Lawrence? So simple, looks so comfortable, and so pretty. Why weren’t people talking about how effortlessly gorgeous she looks?<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh26eBXDTy7lIcT6cFq2c2JmVYLichDA10EgXgzHoBAomYHZXfeZac6xnYFmf858vwS34sB3tfby8-fFE7i2rVlqY-V4UnCSJSpRY0BTcAlpIUSgQ321m394o7pBE0Nrad2waLoTULuTole/s1600/Mark%252BWahlberg%252BHBO%252BPost%252B2011%252BGolden%252BGlobe%252BAwards%252BuJhV6RglayQl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="300" width="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh26eBXDTy7lIcT6cFq2c2JmVYLichDA10EgXgzHoBAomYHZXfeZac6xnYFmf858vwS34sB3tfby8-fFE7i2rVlqY-V4UnCSJSpRY0BTcAlpIUSgQ321m394o7pBE0Nrad2waLoTULuTole/s320/Mark%252BWahlberg%252BHBO%252BPost%252B2011%252BGolden%252BGlobe%252BAwards%252BuJhV6RglayQl.jpg" /></a></div><br />
We need to talk about Mark Wahlberg for a second. He looks great, sure, but I’m pretty sure <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/assets/users16/breesays/default/christian-bale-mark-wahlberg-arriving--large-msg-129885576247.jpg">he wears the same tux to every awards show</a>. Thrifty, but change it up, dude. (PS Check out Batman's awesome beard!)<br />
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It’s tradition for me to text one of my besties during every awards show. We’re catty and get excited when our fake celeb boyfriends show up looking awesome (more on that another day). We were torn about Cate Blanchett’s dress, but the final vote goes towards the fact that it was amazing, and I am naming her best dressed. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpQVii2w3r-_53fwiWsm73dWKkmIqMlixCAiaxkx8Tx6596R1n_YI44SO6mP7CVu-nxzmCIALNuqWiuQyVQQWtx_ix9znsX1WiVnIFt-1VvUDYwofox2Qom6gzMU-nxsJcbowipOA3IL62/s1600/CateBlanchett.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="220" width="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpQVii2w3r-_53fwiWsm73dWKkmIqMlixCAiaxkx8Tx6596R1n_YI44SO6mP7CVu-nxzmCIALNuqWiuQyVQQWtx_ix9znsX1WiVnIFt-1VvUDYwofox2Qom6gzMU-nxsJcbowipOA3IL62/s320/CateBlanchett.jpg" /></a></div><br />
I honestly don’t think I could have picked a worst dressed this year. The show might have been sub-par (sorry), but I really think everyone looked pulled together (<a href= "http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2011/02/28/gal_oscars_red_carpet_bonham_carter1.jpg">yeah, even Helena Bonham- Carter</a>). <br />
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In conclusion, I leave you with an amazing picture that I found while Stumbling. I hope that next year, some celebrity follows the steps below so we’re focusing on more fun things like crazy fashion choices—not laughing while someone’s insane, drug addicted father word vomits Busey-like sentences and puts hundreds of people out of a job while he’s “winning”. Here’s to next year!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw4fioD_cyBqtusir079eqTIGBQGF9G2fBsdhV-ioABOlJFMd94rkJEYkkzpnldDixyZDk45yD6d215VkIm1qJNr-uV0xexp3afRXySwqQwq7skoI004123vECZgUEQT5aTTez6U4M4Tgj/s1600/Lesson891.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="246" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw4fioD_cyBqtusir079eqTIGBQGF9G2fBsdhV-ioABOlJFMd94rkJEYkkzpnldDixyZDk45yD6d215VkIm1qJNr-uV0xexp3afRXySwqQwq7skoI004123vECZgUEQT5aTTez6U4M4Tgj/s320/Lesson891.jpg" /></a></div>Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-13001243865858283652011-02-21T13:30:00.000-08:002011-02-21T14:46:54.596-08:00An Open Letter to Jennifer Love Hewitt<img src= "http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Hewitt022509_02-full.jpg"><br />
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Dear Jennifer Love Hewitt,<br />
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We need to talk about your wardrobe. I’ve been silent long enough. This absolutely has to stop. You’re pretty. You’re young. Why keep dressing like a teenager that has no idea what she’s doing? <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/jennifer-love-hewitt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="300" width="200" src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/jennifer-love-hewitt.jpg" /></a></div>First of all, let me say that I get it. When these pictures surfaced, I was just as confused as you were. Why were people hounding you? I’m positive that the biggest reason “curvy” girls get scrutinized is due to the fact that most of the general public doesn’t recognize that “curvy” is not a politically correct term for “overweight”. “Curvy” girls like you do not have big arms or legs, which you obviously do not according to those pictures. <br />
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What I don’t get is why you have continued to employ your personal stylist. Look, I watched the Golden Globes and even though I didn’t see that Lifetime movie you were nominated for and I don’t watch your show where you see dead people, I was curious to see what you wore. I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed. See, you’re a smart girl. We both know that boys don’t look you directly in the eye while they talk to you (it’s a little further South). Why then would you choose to wear a crumb catcher-like pleated thing up top? I will give you points for the color (it goes extremely well with your skin tone) and I will even compliment you on the cinched waist (more on that in a second). But what’s going on? Is this part of your “I’ll make people like me for my brain” campaign? It’s not working. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://jenniferlovehewittphotos.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/jennifer-love-hewitt-fat-4525-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="300" width="200" src="http://jenniferlovehewittphotos.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/jennifer-love-hewitt-fat-4525-2.jpg" /></a></div>I saw you on “The Talk” a few weeks ago and I’ve seen you on other shows since then. It hit me that not only do you refuse to wear a bra with straps (WHY!), you also don’t understand that you have waist, Miss. Please define it. Contrary to what you believe, you have big boobs. That means BRA and NO FLOWY TOPS. Therefore, when something makes your shirt with no structure go outwards, it will stay outwards.<br />
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Also, I’m not going to forget about <a href= "http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/3298925396_7540c444d9_z.jpg">when you dressed as Audrey Hepburn for your birthday</a>. Silly me, I thought those pictures were from the set of “The Audrey Hepburn Story”. It wasn’t! <a href= "http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Lindsay-Lohan.jpg">You don’t see other celebrities doing a movie and somehow dressing like that person/ decade</a>. What was that about?<br />
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I’ve seen paparazzi pictures of you that are adorable. I know you have it in you to dress better. Jennifer, the Academy Awards are next week. If you need a stylist, contact me. Until then, buy a good bra, find some clothes that fit you, and find a look that works. I believe in you.<br />
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Love,<br />
JessJess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-65721648667826360872010-11-13T00:47:00.000-08:002010-11-13T01:02:54.450-08:00Is Tim Gunn officially the only nice person in fashion?<img src= "http://blogs.laweekly.com/stylecouncil/2010/11/02/fluvia.jpg"><br />
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<i>"I feel like a model. It justifies everyone in my life who told me I wouldn’t be anything until I lost weight. It justifies that little girl who cried because she didn’t think she could be in front of the camera. And it’s for other girls who feel like they can’t do this or that and feel like they’re not pretty and not worthy of having their photo taken." --Gabourey Sidibe</i><br />
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A few days ago, I was playing on StumbleUpon (which, by the way, if you haven’t downloaded, do yourself a favor and do it NOW), when a very interesting site came my way. The title was <a href= http://blogs.laweekly.com/stylecouncil/2010/11/full_figured_fashion_week.php> “Full Figured Fashion Week: How To Be Fashionably Fat”</a>. Thinking that this had to be some type of sarcastic twist on itself (they couldn’t be serious), I read on. Funnily enough, the writer, a person named Gendy Alimurung, was in fact completely serious. So serious, that the entire article was about these full figured women and how great it was that they were having their own show during fashion week. <br />
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At risk of making this entire blog about my hatred for the way that Gendy wrote about these women, I will steer my feelings towards their rightful destination: The fact that these women, be it plus sized or “fatshionistas” (yes, that IS the word she used), are NORMAL WOMEN. Those of you that know me in person (and have only met me within the past 4 years) might be saying, “Jess, why the hell do you care?” I care because I used to be one of these women. Almost every shopping trip with my mom would result in me crying in the dressing room, crying in the car, or crying at home. They just didn’t make “cute” juniors clothes in plus sizes while I was going to middle school and high school. I would have to shop in the women’s department when I was in 6th grade. <br />
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Although Gendy makes valid points with the “how to survive stylishly in a thin person’s world”, it is pointed out at the beginning of the article that they aren’t even her points! They are from these “Fatshionistas”. After rereading the entire article, that same fury that was inside me the first time has returned with full force. The world, especially the fashion industry as a whole, needs to realize that this is what real women look like. Do you ever wonder why you go to a store and the only sizes they seem to have are 0-4? It’s because nobody is that size. Take it from a girl who used to be a 24, stores sell out of the bigger sizes first. <br />
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Plus sized women are often treated as not only lesser beings, but in my opinion also like women with a deformity. Being overweight isn’t an ailment, it isn’t a birth defect (which Ms. Gendy should realize, as her Twitter picture clearly portrays her to be one of these women she is writing about). It is something that is a part of you, like a haircut. It can be changed if you want, but it’s who you are. Stop smiling at the heavy girl because she found a coat that works for her. Don’t pat yourself on the back because you remembered to not have everyone announce their t-shirt size aloud for that team building workshop. I’m not telling you not to have manners. I’m simply requesting that you understand that “full figured” women are the same as “skinny” women: the only difference is that they just have a nicer rack and can fill out their jeans better.<br />
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Yes, I understand that since the beginning of time, people have been obsessed with weight and sizes. I get that as much as I beg and plead, nobody will ever fully stop talking about it. Hell, I just took time out of my sleeping schedule to write a blog about it. All I ask is that we stop treating these women like they’re different. They aren’t. They’re normal. They don’t need their own form of fashion week-- fashion week should include everyone. (Just ask Tim Gunn. In his book, <i>Gunn's Golden Rules</i> he clearly states that he feels that plus sized women are treated as lesser beings when they should be treated equally.)<br />
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I want to apologize if this comes off as a rant, but this is a very sensitive subject for me. As someone who has openly struggled with body image and weight issues for most of my life, I feel that something needs to be said. I do have a message for these women who participated in this “full figured fashion week”: Good for you. And I’m saying “Good for you” in a way that you give props to your friend who just socked the prom queen in the face.Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-27064054467753902522010-07-11T23:18:00.000-07:002010-07-11T23:28:10.530-07:00How To Be A Cute Boy<img src= "http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kpkwdsDaTu1qzkj7fo1_500.jpg"><br />
Wait. Before you say anything, I know. I haven’t written anything in months. I have been slacking in this department and I apologize. A lot has happened since I wrote my last blog. There have been infomercials, tours, trips to Vegas and I actually have a real job now. A real job where I tend to day dream on occasion. I work in an office with a pretty lenient dress code. From what I have observed, it’s just “be clean” and “don’t wear anything offensive”. My building is full of offices, which is full of dudes… going to the office. Every day I observe them, wondering if they picked out what they were wearing of if they happened to have a girl type in their lives who helped them with their wardrobe choices. Then it hit me: For any person to be attractive to the opposite sex, there are only a few essential pieces that they need to own. Guess what? I know what they are! They are so basic, so simple, and guess what: 4 out of 5 pieces can be UNDER $30! Score! Here we go!<br />
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<img src= "http://www.northbynorthwestern.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/bradley-cooper.jpg"><br />
<b>1.) Aviators.</b> There’s a reason why these sunglasses have been worn by every badass ever for the past, I don’t know, <i>thirty years</I>. Think about it: any time there is some hot shot guy in a movie (usually toting a gun) he’s wearing aviators. He’s one of two things: super cool, super slick, great dresser <i>or</I> he’s the laid back, probably wearing shorts, funny guy. Win/ win. My sister has worn these for years, strictly bought in gas stations around the country. I suggest this idea because Sunglasses Law states that the more you spend on a pair, the more likely you are to have them stolen or broken. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Oh, also may I add, for most girls, putting on a pair of these suckers will automatically make you drastically better looking. Hyde from <i>That 70s Show</I> anyone?<br />
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<img src= "https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDk5-KG-oOMRZYiEvLI7laHJ8FTh4KRplq8MoYYC3EutNA4r51AsAk9eWnn6XTiPcn4S5m8FPzEbeqaNLirbqW8OSVX79Xx-B-rlrmNJ__eT0KazMf4G4tbIm1ca6ZdXjzt9KUhLP7Qlk/s400/Justin_Timberlake.jpg"><br />
<b>2. A good pair of jeans.</b> I can <i>not</I> stress this enough. Please, for the love of God, buy a pair of jeans that fits you. While at a stop light the other day, a boy walked in front of my car. He had on clean sneakers (see below), a good cardigan (which I would include, by the way, but not all boys like cardigans--- your loss), and a baseball cap. Nice outfit, right? Oh, wait a second. Your ass is completely hanging out of your tight as hell girl pants. What? How is this comfortable? You can feel comfortable, look cool, and still be put together. This #2 rule should just be “don’t let your ass hang out, you’re not in prison and certainly not impressing anyone”.<br />
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<img src= "http://sneakermestupid.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/2cf083e5.jpg"><br />
<b>3. A nice pair of kicks.</b> A couple of years ago, my step dad told me that when he was on his high school basketball team, he got a pair of converse for practice and another pair strictly for games. Why? Because a good pair of sneakers makes you look clean. Think about it, put on those cool sunglasses, that awesome pair of jeans, your shirt is clean, your hair is styled. Try putting on a dirty, smelly ass pair of shoes and you look like a slob. Meanwhile, that douche bag with that tank top and ripped jeans looks a little bit pulled together with his crisp, white, nicely tied shoes. On a related note, your grandma might not agree with me (well, unless she’s <i>mega</I> cool) but a good pair of tennis shoes could even jazz up a suit. Just sayin’.<br />
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<img src= "http://scifiwire.com/assets_c/2010/04/CraigFergusonSkeletonRobot-thumb-550x309-36760.jpg"><br />
<b>4. A good suit. </b> Speaking of suits! You need a good one. I don’t care if you’re flippin’ burgers at Hot n’ Now (which there is no shame in, by the way) you still need a nice suit. There are weddings, funerals, maybe a job interview, and hopefully a date that you want to take your lady on-- all where you will look incredibly handsome with a nice suit. Here’s where it gets tricky: They don’t have to be expensive. Yes, you should find something quality. (Target is your friend. Use it.) At the same time though, this is something you’ll have for years, think of it as an investment. An investment that’ll score a lotta chicks.<br />
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<img src= "http://www.popcrunch.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/Jared-Leto-Pink-Mohawk.jpg"><br />
<b>5. A good haircut.</b> I was a professional hair stylist for a little over two years. In that time, I did a ton of really crappy haircuts. Not in quality, but in type. Scenester boys, redneck boys, ghetto boys, you name it, I cut it. I wasn’t happy about it, but I cut it. If you want man-bangs, you better be able to pull them off. At the same time, if you want 80s metal hair, you better hairspray that shit as high as it can go and own it. Please get your hair cut. If you don’t use products, tell your stylist. He or she will cut your hair in a way that you don’t need them. Invest in a good shampoo instead. There is no shame at all in taking pride in the way that you look, and it isn’t a stab at your masculinity to flip through a hair book once in a while. Sheesh.<br />
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If you have any more questions, might I suggest picking up a copy of the latest GQ. That magazine is amazing and like the boy’s version of Vanity Fair. (Girls, bonus: There are fitness tips, movie reviews, GOOD diet food, lots of chicks with cool hair and makeup to copy, and lots and lots of good looking guys. YES!) On your next shopping trip, please take all of these things into consideration. Just remember: When you look good, you feel good.Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-39345134202740847722010-04-03T00:51:00.000-07:002010-04-03T00:51:31.963-07:00Everyone in Los Angeles is beautiful.<img src= "http://www.mtv.com/movies/photos/h/halloween_premiere_08232007/76310834.jpg"><br />
<br />
Well, I’m officially here. Homeless and unemployed, but here. It took four days, three hotel rooms, two fish tacos, and one cell phone car charger (thanks Bucky, Drunk Dougie, Jase and Mom) to get here. I packed up Trixie* like a puzzle, even throwing trivial things in little nooks and crannies that I could find. What surprised me the most, however, was that I could fit my entire wordrobe inside my tiny car. Thanks to gigantic plastic air tight bags, I was able to do it. I had a tank full of gas, money in my pocket, Mike had the GPS, all electronic devices were charged… so what was there to be scared of?<br />
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How to fucking dress when I get here, that’s what!<br />
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Everyone in this town has amazing outfits on. Even the hookers that I saw outside The Comedy Store tonight! How am I able to have any self confidence -nay- survive with a wardrobe that is worthy of Michigan only? I have wool sweaters and skirts! I wear tights with everything! My flat black boots are my favorite things in the world! It’s hot here! The only light thing I own are my collection of cut up tshirts. <a href= "http://www.thescene.com.au/upload/tn2_zooey_deschanel-3.jpg">Zooey Deschanel</a> and <a href= "http://www.upscalehype.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/34205pcn_leto08.jpg.jpeg">Jared Leto</a> have not prepared me for how to dress in Los Angeles. Maybe if I had <a href= "http://www.scandalist.com/files/2008/08/katy-perry-1.jpg">Katy Perry’s legs</a>, than I would be able to wear shorts when it got hot. But I don’t, and I haven’t worn a pair of shorts since I was 15 (I’m not joking: that’s eight years, not including pajama shorts and this past Halloween). <br />
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Have you looked at the weather forecast? Of course you haven’t. I am the only person that I know who checks the weather obsessively. For the record, it’s been in the high 60s here. Perfect, just the way I like it. Jeans. Hoodie. Fingerless gloves. Miley flats. Check x4. I think I’ll be OK for now. If not, there’s always Melrose.<br />
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<I>*Trixie: (n) the name of my beloved 2007 Royal Blue Cobalt. I love her. Too bad I don’t love her enough to get her an oil change on time. Sorry, Homegirl. Maybe next 2,000 miles.</I>Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-12179742537125232192010-03-15T19:00:00.000-07:002010-03-15T19:11:03.653-07:00"It looks like shower curtains in Florida." -MikeIt’s a common occurrence: my boyfriend, Mike, and I are sitting in the basement, watching <i>Celebrity Rehab</i> (or <i>Minute To Win It</I> which is such a fun show-- give it a try). Incredibly full from a gigantic dinner, we’re probably in our Snuggies, each looking up random shit on our laptops. He’s reading about who is rumored to be Captain America and I’m online window-shopping. I say “window-shopping” because I open every single item I want in a new tab, add it to a wish list or my shopping cart, and walk away. But I don’t walk away before I ask Mike’s opinion. For the last four years, I’ve considered myself lucky to have my boyfriend also be my shopping partner. He will give me honest opinions on dresses, shoes, and even the fit of jeans. Are all couples like this? Do all girls have a boyfriend/ finance/ husband who will honestly tell them if that dress that they so dearly love on the rack looks like absolute crap when it’s actually on? <br />
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These questions were answered while I was passed out on the couch tonight watching <i>Say Yes To The Dress</I>. This show has become one of my favorites, even as a girl who isn’t anywhere close to picking out a wedding dress*. The episode I was watching featured couples who came to dress shop together. Every single one of these girls expressed one of my greatest fears: What if your future husband doesn’t like the dress you picked out? Your wedding is one of the most important days of your entire life. A bride wants to feel beautiful, but how can she if her new husband can’t stand how she looks? I can’t believe I haven’t realized this before. As much as anyone wants to say that they’re 100% OK with how they look, you can’t sit there and tell me that what other people think of how you’re dressed doesn’t have any effect on what you buy. Everyone who buys clothes wants a second opinion from someone. Be it your mom, sister, best friend or even your boyfriend.. <br />
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Believe it or not, boys have an opinion about the things that you wear. They will notice those new jeans you just bought, and not because they’re really tight and show off your ass. Maybe you got a pair that are shredded up and really cool, or maybe you got one of those disgusting pairs that have that dirty brown wash to them. (Why the hell do they even make those? “Yeah, I‘ll take a pair of pants that look like I‘ve been rolling around in dirt all day. Thanks.”) I’ll give you a couple of examples.<br />
I love these shoes: <br />
<a href="http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Blog/?action=view¤t=iron-fist-zombie-stomper-platform-i.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Blog/iron-fist-zombie-stomper-platform-i.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a><br />
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My boyfriend hates these shoes. While I’m shopping, I’ll ask him, “What do you think of these?” His response, “Here is my problem with those shoes. What are you going to wear with them?” What am I going to wear with them? How the hell should I know? They’re amazing shoes! Look at them! They’re loud, tall, peep toe and have a <b>bow on the back of them</b>! Guess what? They’re also $44, and I shouldn’t be spending that on a pair of shoes. <i>Especially</I> on a pair of shoes that I have nothing to wear them with. Without the opinion of Mike, I probably would have bought those $44 Zombie shoes, anxiously awaited them to come to my door, giddily opened the box, and… realized I own nothing that matches them. See? See why having a boy around is a good idea? (They also make them in ballet flats, which I will be buying. As a girl who only wears heels with dresses, my options are increased with the possibility of a flat.)<br />
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Here’s another example.<br />
<a href="http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Blog/?action=view¤t=11599-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/Blog/11599-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a><br />
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The bright colors on this dress are what drew me to it in the first place. How pretty! Strapless! Bright colors! But did I notice that ruffle on the bottom? Did I notice that bra cup bodice? Nope! I was to distracted by the crazy candy colors that are splashed across this dress. <br />
As I’m typing this, all I can think of is Gretchen Wieners from <i>Mean Girls</I>. “You don’t try clothes on without asking your friends if it looks good on you first. How are you supposed to know if you like something?” I’m not asking you to not think for yourself. If you honestly like something, get it. Don’t be Gretchen Wieners. Get yourself a shopping partner. Get someone who has your best interest at heart, knows how to say things nicely, and knows what you like. Bonus points if that person happens to be your significant other. <br />
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Those shoes are from <a href= "www.pinupgirlclothing.com">PinupGirlClothing.com</a><br />
The dress is from <a href= "www.modcloth.com">ModCloth.com</a><br />
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*This isn’t a hit to anyone wondering, I’m just saying that I have bigger things to spend my money on at the moment. Like <b>moving to Los Angeles</b>!Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-80008081242929937362010-03-10T18:38:00.000-08:002010-03-10T18:49:36.437-08:00"If fashion was porn, this dress is the money shot!" -Gabourey Sidibe<img src= "http://media3.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/photo/gallery/100308/GAL-10Mar08-3982/media/PHO-10Mar08-210051.jpg"><br />
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I knocked over three (count 'em, THREE) drinks on Oscar Sunday. Why was I acting so spazzy? In my excitement over, well, <i>everything</i>, I wouldn't stop looking at the TV long enough to reach for something like a normal person. Two strawberry lemonades and one diet coke later (sorry Mike), I had finally calmed down enough to focus… and get a lid for my drink.<br />
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Maybe it was the excessive (yes, excessive) amounts of glitter on stage? Shiny things tend to distract anything with a pulse and I think every actress in Hollywood got that memo Sunday morning. Prime examples of massive sparkle would be <a href= "http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/03/08/article-1256195-089D6D94000005DC-672_306x728.jpg">Carey Mulligan</a> (who had an amazing dress by the way. Look closely at the sparkles: they're little trinkets!), <a href= "http://i.usatoday.net/communitymanager/_photos/lifeline-live/2010/03/07/tinafeyx-inset-community.jpg">Tina Fey</a>, <a href= "http://x17online.com/Oscars/zoeoscarredcarpet.jpg">Zoe Saldana</a>, and <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/cameron-diaz-030710.preview.jpg">Cameron Diaz</a> to name a few.<br />
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Sparkle and structure were the popular choices of the night… even though <a href= "http://wedding-pictures.onewed.com/edgy/files/imagecache/576w/images/1042920/armani-prive-sparkling-red-carpet-dresses-jennifer-lopez-amanda-seyfried-strapless.jpg">Jennifer Lopez</a> was a little too reminiscent of Eva Mendes (<a href= "http://circle.stylemepretty.com/nereid/files/2009/10/eva-mendes-golden-globes-2009.jpg">circa Golden Globes 2009</a>) for my liking. Don’t get me wrong, it was a gorgeous dress and she wore it very, very well. But didn’t she -or her stylist- think that maybe that’s what everyone would think of? I feel that to rock something on the red carpet, you need to have your own image. If it was a cooler dress, I could be saying, “Wow! Remember that piece of shit Eva Mendes wore last year? Jennifer Lopez knows how to do crazy origami the right way!” No dice, J.Lo.<br />
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Dammit <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/kristen-stewart-030710.preview.jpg">Kristen Stewart</a>! Why yous gotta be so awkward? Her dress is beautiful, looks comfy as all get out, and has a color that would be flattering on any skin type. Too bad <a href= "http://teendaily.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/100308-41.jpg">awkward-as-hell Kristen Stewart</a> was the one wearing it. One of these days, nay, my next blog, I will write all about rocking the shit out of whatever you wear. My biggest problem with Kristen is that she never, <i>ever</I> looks confident in anything she wears. What is it going to take, Kristen? Tell us! (I’m still excited for “The Runaways”… don’t tell anyone.) On that note, <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/miley-cyrus-030710.preview.jpg">Miley Cyrus needs to stand up straight</a>. Her dress was beautiful, a little tight up top, but beautiful. <a href= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2010-03-08-97515860.jpg">Gabourey Sidibe</a> is a prime, perfect example of how to rock a dress.<br />
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<a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/charlize-theron-030710.preview.jpg">Charlize Theron</a> was best described as “Boob Dress Theron” by my friend Nikki. I could care less how couture and high fashion that dress is. It’s disgusting. Worst dressed? Maybe. Speaking of boobs, <b><a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/03/maggie-gyllenhaal-2010-oscars.jpg">Maggie Gyllenhaal</a> wore a bra</b>! Look how amazing she looks when her boobs are where they’re supposed to be! Her dress was so bright and fun and reminded me of spring. Good job, Maggie. Keep it up! …That could work on two levels. But seriously… keep wearing a bra.<br />
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<a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/anna-kendrick-030710-1.preview.jpg">Anna Kendrick’s</a> hair was so fantastic, and I don‘t even like her (sad, I can't find a picture from the back). Tight, uncomfortable updos remind me of prom and pagents. This is how you do an updo. I don’t know how she does it, but <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/03/queen-latifah-2010-oscars.jpg">Queen Latifah</a> can pull off something tighter and slicked back. You know who can’t? <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/amanda-seyfried-030710.preview.jpg">Amanda Seyfried</a>. <a href= "http://i.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01592/460_oscars2_1592036c.jpg">Sandra Bullock’s</a> hair was so simple, and darker than she usually has it. That chocolate brown color looked so pretty on her. Oh, by the way, Hey <a href= "http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2010/03/09/alg_clooney_canalis.jpg">George Clooney</a>. Do you need a barber? Are you having trouble finding someone to cut your hair? It sure seems like it, because you look like someone’s dad in the middle of a <a href= "http://i.thisislondon.co.uk/i/pix/2009/07/clooney-500x621.jpg">holy-shit-I‘m-turning-50</a> freak out. Don’t worry, I’ll be there in two weeks.<br />
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Let’s talk about cute boys. I’m really happy <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/03/keanu-reeves-oscars-2010-red-carpet.jpg">Keanu Reeves</a> got to keep his Constantine costume. Thank God, because apparently he has no other dress clothes. Keanu and <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/taylor-lautner-030710.preview.jpg">Taylor Lautner</a> need to go tux shopping and wear something different. We’re in a recession, I get it, but <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jjr//2010/01/globes-lautner/taylor-lautner-golden-globes-01.jpg">Taylor</a> needs to take some of that werewolf money and <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jjr/2009/06/lautner-cfda/taylor-lautner-cfda-fashion-01.jpg">get another tux</a>. Take a note from <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/ryan-reynolds-030710.preview.jpg">Ryan Reynolds</a>. Way to wear <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/tom-ford-030710.preview.jpg">Tom Ford (who also looked awesome)</a>, even if you weren’t supporting his movie. <br />
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How tacky, by the way, was it that <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/suzy-amis-james-cameron-030710.preview.jpg">James Cameron and lady friend</a> wore blue when they were there because of “Avatar”? Why didn’t you just wear an “Avatar” t-shirt? We all get it. You’re doing very well. Guess what, Cameron? You lost! To your ex wife! <a href= "http://i.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01592/bigelow_1592045c.jpg">Who looked amazing!</a> (It’s ok, James. I still like <a href= "http://ournamesrhyme.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/leod.jpg">“Titanic”</a> and some of the <a href= "http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/86/Kyle_Reese.png">“Terminator”</a> movies.)<br />
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Now James Cameron has me in a mood to talk about people who don‘t have a mirror. <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/faith-hill-tim-mcgraw-030710.preview.jpg">Faith Hill</a>, you make shitty music. Now you wear shitty clothes. I’m over it. <a href= "http://www.myfashionlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Diane-Kruger.jpg">Diane Kruger… what?</a> I don’t understand how she left the house and thought, “Yeah! I look awesome!” At least <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/quentin-tarantino-diane-kruger-030710.preview.jpg">Quentin Tarantino</a> (aka Diane Kruger's retarded older brother) improved from the Golden Globes… a little bit. <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/demi-moore-030710.preview.jpg">Demi Moore</a>, you wore a pretty dress. You have a hot bod. Your shoes were cool. Too bad everything was the same color and now you look like one big blush colored mass. Don’t get me wrong, the dress was stunning. Just not with that skin or shoes. <br />
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Everyone needs to take a hint from the <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/susan-robert-downey-030710.preview.jpg">Downey’s</a>. Robert Downey, Jr and Susan Downey looked so awesome. I know, tennis shoes at the Academy Awards are normally such a bad idea. If it were anyone else, I would have hated it. But it’s <a href= "http://www.altfg.com/Stars/photos3/robert-downey-jr.jpg">Robert Downey, Jr.</a> He could wear whatever the hell he wants. <br />
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<b>Time for Top Picks.</b><br />
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<b>Best dressed female goes to <a href= "http://www.alllacqueredup.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/sandy-powell-green-nails-oscars-academy-awards.jpg">Sandy Powell</a></b>, the winner for best costume design (for “The Young Victoria”). She may be “feeling greedy” because this is Oscar number three, but with clothes like that, she deserves it. I wish I could find a shot of her entire outfit, because (ok, minus the stripper nails) she looked ah-may-zing.<br />
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<b>Dress I want goes to <a href= "http://i.usatoday.net/communitymanager/_photos/lifeline-live/2010/03/07/mileycyrusx-inset-community.jpg">Miley Cyrus</a></b>. If I could, that would be my wedding dress. <br />
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<b>Best dressed male goes to <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/jake-gyllenhaal-030710.preview.jpg">Jake Gyllenhaal</b></a>, and that doesn’t have anything to do with my recent revelation of <a href= "http://crewtruth.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/jake_gyllenhaal.jpg">how hot he is</a>. His tux looked amazing, his hair was styled, he wasn’t clean shaven- but that’s ok. Rock it out, Gooberballs!!<br />
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<b>Best hair goes to <a href= "http://blog.teenvogue.com/beauty/blogs/beauty/assets_c/2010/03/anna-kendrick-030710-4-thumb-233x373-36161.jpg">Anna Kendrick</a></b>. Simple. Comfortable. Easy. She could have done that by herself, and I mean that in a good way.<br />
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<b>Best Dressed Couple, gotta give it to <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/03/robert-downey-jr-2010-oscars.jpg">Robert Downey, Jr and Susan Downey</a></b>. They looked different and didn’t feel the need to match (Are you listening, Cameron and lady?) just because they went there together. But an extremely close second place pair are <a href= "http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/03/08/article-1256286-089EF8E1000005DC-770_634x861.jpg">Jeff Bridges and wife ALSO NAMED SUSAN</a>. I guess the key to being awesome at the Oscars is bringing your wife named Susan. Hear that, Cameron? Just kidding. Kind of.<br />
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<b>Worst dressed female goes to <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/sarah-jessica-parker-030710.preview.jpg">Sarah Jessica Parker</a></b>. Get outta here with your disgusting choke dress and bad weave.<br />
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<b>Dress I want to burn goes to <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/03/diane-kruger-2010-oscars-red-carpet.jpg">Diane Kruger</a></b>. That’s all I have to say about that.<br />
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<b>Worst dressed male is <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/chris-pine-030710.preview.jpg">Chris Pine</a></b>. I know, shocking. He’s adorable. It's not obvious, but it's still bugging the crap out of me. Please, take note Chris, and bring out your amazing blue eyes with a pocket square or tie… not blue lapels. Gross. <br />
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<b>Worst dressed couple would be <a href= "http://www.americansuperstarmag.com/sites/default/files/images/nicole-richie-joel-madden-030710.preview.jpg">Nichole Ritchie and Joel Madden</a></b>. Why? Take off your sunglasses. You’re not Sam Jackson. And Nichole Ritchie, I know you’re a mom now. That doesn’t mean that you need to cover up that body that you worked so hard for! Show off some arm or leg or <i>something</I>! Leave the 100% covered up look to Meryl Streep (and only Meryl Streep).<br />
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That's all I've got. The show itself was awesome, I love Steve Martin too much for words. Comment, leave your thoughts! Only 364 days left until the next Academy Awards. I can’t wait!Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-38584106005759116122010-02-03T14:38:00.000-08:002010-02-03T14:38:35.291-08:00Oh, Betsey Johnson.<img src="http://www.betseyjohnson.com/store/productimages/regular/7931_ivory_l.jpg"><br />
<a href= http://www.betseyjohnson.com/store/productdetails2.aspx?categoryid=9066&productid=7931&np=9066">More info here.</a><br />
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Your thoughts.Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-20119150771561870542010-02-01T21:39:00.000-08:002010-02-01T22:01:38.705-08:00Beyonce's Robot Dress Was The Only Cool Thing About The GrammysNot gonna lie, I only watched an hour of the Grammy Awards. To be completely honest, I don't care about them. The only reason I watched that hour was because I was killing time before the "Tough Love" finale. While I'm typing this, I'm watching the "Fashion Police" on E. All of them will make that completely valid point that you can take some risks at the Grammys. A celebrity can wear something straight off the runway at this awards show and get on the best dressed list, as opposed to wearing it at the Academy Awards and get stuck on the worst dressed for being "weird". Cool to look at, but I don't care. Here's my short list. I'd like your thoughts.<br />
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<img src= "http://www.thefashiontime.com/wp-content/themes/mimbo2.2/images/2010/02/lea-michelle.jpg"><br />
Lea Michelle was the best dressed. I want this dress. I will wear it every day.<br />
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<a href= http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2010/02/grammys-beyonce/beyonce-six-grammys-05.jpg> Robot Dress. Best.</a><br />
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<a href= http://www.spreadit.org/pics/grammy-red-carpet-2010.jpg>Awesome.</a><br />
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<a href= http://blog.zap2it.com/thedishrag/miley-cyrus-grammys-2010.jpg> It's Miley! Super cute. The world needs more dresses with long sleeves. </a><br />
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<a href= http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2010/02/dion-grammys/celine-dion-2010-grammys-01.jpg> Twinsies!</a><br />
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<a href= http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2010/01/snooki-grammy/snooki-2010-grammy-awards-10.jpg> Snooki. Who invited you? Nobody knew who you were fifteen minutes ago. Time's up. </a><br />
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<a href= http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2010/01/spears-grammy/britney-spears-2010-grammy-awards-red-carpet-inside-06.jpg> What? I'm over Britney. </a><br />
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<a href= http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2010/01/jackson-grammy/prince-paris-jackson-2010-grammy-awards-05.jpg> Hey Paris, we're all waiting for you to grow up, be beautiful and save the world. This girl looks amazingly badass. I would not only high five her, I would ask to borrow that jacket.</a>Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-49981064927409013672010-01-23T23:46:00.000-08:002010-01-24T00:58:00.044-08:005 Simple Rules for Dressing Yourself.Yesterday, I went to the movies and saw a fourteen year old girl without pants on.<br />
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No, I’m not kidding. This is a strong epidemic among girls 14-24. I suspect the culprits (even though I love them) are Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, and Rihanna. This girl was standing there with her popcorn, yelling to her friends (hi parents, let’s teach your children manners), with a button down shirt, Uggs, and what I believe to be white tights. Not thick leggings, not stretch pants, straight up tights. <br />
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If it’s been said once, it’s been said a billion times: <strong>leggings are not </strong> - I repeat- <strong>are not pants</strong>. Don’t people know this by now? If I can see your ass and <i>everything else</I>, they are not pants. I thought every girl was taught at age four why it is important to wear pants; you can climb things, sit whichever way you want, and boys certainly can’t see up your skirt if you aren’t wearing one. (That sounded dirtier than I meant it, but you get the just.) In our quest to make ourselves more attractive to the opposite sex, have we forgotten the simple rules of decency and class that we were taught at such a young age? With that being said, I decided to make a couple simple rules, because apparently, they’re being forgotten. So here we go:<br />
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The basic things your mother taught you that are still true:<br />
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<img src= "http://14.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kvosk4gE821qzjggvo1_400.jpg"><br />
1. <strong>Leggings Aren’t a Substitute For Pants</strong>. I told you I’d have to say it again. Apparently Facebook fan pages and constant status updates aren’t enough to spread the word. Leggings are appropriate to wear under a short skirt, a sweater dress, a tunic, a long (and I mean long) t-shirt. Rule of thumb is this: if your ass is hanging out, time to rearrange your wardrobe choice or get a second opinion.<br />
<a href= "http://www.whudat.com/news/images/stylish-meagan-good-coco-deville.jpg">Exhibit A.</a> <a href= "http://blogue.us/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/bootypole.jpg">Exhibit B.</a><br />
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2. <strong>If The Temperature is Below Freezing, Don‘t Wear a Tank Top</strong>. This happens too many times to mention at shows, bars, and (what the hell), at the mall. Yes, your top would be adorable in, say, July. Or California. We live in Michigan. And it’s cold. If everyone around you is walking around in jackets and gloves, chances are you shouldn’t be wearing it. Which brings us to our next point…<br />
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3. <strong>Know How Big Your Boobs Are</strong>. This goes hand in hand with <strong>Know Your Bra Size & Wear One</strong>. It’s become a game between my boyfriend and I to see how many sluts we can point out throughout the night. The “Hey look, that girl’s about to flash everyone” game has become so popular, we’ve even gotten our friend Nina to join in on a couple of occasions. At Warped Tour this summer, we saw a fifteen year old girl with her boobs hiked up so high, her nipple was showing. I kid you not, the girl’s nipple was hanging out. No joke, it was so bad I thought Chris Hansen was going to pop out from behind the merch booth and invite me to have a seat. Remember that speed dating scene in “40 Year Old Virgin” where Andy is sitting at the table with the girl and her boob gradually falls out? Don’t be that girl. Nobody likes that girl. Sleezy boys want to hook up with that girl, but nobody likes her. Put on a sweater, whore.<br />
<a href= "http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e6/Cleavage_(1).jpg">Exhibit A.</a> <a href= "http://www.blogcdn.com/green.autoblog.com/media/2007/07/malachi-lopez.jpg">Exhibit B.</a><br />
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4. <strong>If Patrick Swayze Walks In Heels Better Than You Do, Time To Practice</strong>. I love heels, I really do. But I also know there are rules with wearing them. None on an eight hour shift, icy sidewalks, or at a show where I‘m going to be standing for hours. Try wearing them around the house to break them in. Nothing looks worse than a girl who is leaning too far forward or backwards, staggering around in a pair of wedges (which I saw later at the mall… what the hell, ladies!). A good trick is to wear them to a party where you know you’re going to take your shoes off at the door. You walk in, show off your shoes, and then get to put them on display for the rest of the party guests as your feet get to relax. Just please make sure that you have well manicured toes. And cute tights. But definitely clean feet.<br />
<a href= "http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/feb2009/9/2/NY_Fashion_Week_model_trips_PicGetty_13516321.jpg">Exhibit A.</a> <a href= "http://photos.posh24.com/p/202635/l/victoria_beckham/victoria_beckhams_missing_heels.jpg">Exhibit B. ...kinda.</a> <br />
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4. <strong>Get Dressed Before You Go Out</strong>. Hey, guys: PJ pants aren’t sexy, presentable, or trendy. There have been too many girls that I’ve seen in this uniform: full makeup, furry boots, Victoria’s Secret Pink sweatpants, North Face fleece, hair in a knot on the top of her head. Double points if she’s wearing a puffy vest. I’m sorry, is this a sleepover and nobody told me? I’m not saying you need to dress to the nines to go to the grocery store! I’m really not! The thing is, I love my lounge pants as much as you do, but if all of us had to get out of our comfy pants to go to the store, you do too. There are a few exceptions, yes. No need to get fully dressed if you’ve got the flu and running to the store for meds, I get it. But your boyfriend doesn’t want to take you to go see “Dear John” while you haven’t even bothered to get dressed. Lounge pants are for lounging. Not for going to the movies, out to dinner, shopping, getting your hair done, going to class, the list goes on. <br />
<a href= "http://veganfashionista.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/hayden-pjs1.jpg">Exhibit A.</a> <a href= "http://candacerose.typepad.com/.a/6a01127964c54a28a40120a55af443970b-800wi">Exhibit B.</a><br />
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5.<strong> Don’t Wear a T-shirt With Stupid Shit On It</strong>. OK. This could be interpreted a couple of different ways. At the Chicago City & Colour show last weekend, Dallas Green brought up an amazing point: let’s trash stupid t-shirts. Any shirt that claims how hot you are or something about the voices in your head? Just don’t wear it. I understand you want to be different. But hey, thanks for helping me out and just telling me ahead of time, “Jess, don’t waste your time. I’m a fucking weirdo.” By the way, Dallas also said that we get rid of Shaggy. I second that.<br />
<a href= "http://www.trendhunter.com/images/phpthumbnails/56180_6_468.jpeg">Exhibit A.</a> <a href= "http://www.trendhunter.com/images/phpthumbnails/56180_7_468.jpeg"> Exhibit B.</a><br />
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These are the biggest things that bother me about society. These rules may seem simple to the average human, but the problem is, most of these average humans don’t follow them. If you or anyone around you begin to break one of these rules, stop. Ask for help. You have a problem, and consider this an intervention. If there are any questions or you want to add to this list, leave a comment. I’m eager to hear them!Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-24107016371844266822010-01-19T01:45:00.000-08:002010-01-19T02:04:35.140-08:00Golden Globes 2010: Ricky Gervais is still awesome.Take a breath in, my cold and flu infected friends. Can you smell that? That wonderful, reminds you of home cooked meals smell? That’s the smell of Awards Season. And it’s my favorite time of year. <br />
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<img src= "http://images.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/20100117/425.gervais.ricky.lc.011710.jpg"><br />
[I ♥ Ricky Gervais.]<br />
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The Golden Globes were on last night. To me, they’re like my birthday dinner before the dessert comes. I’ll look foreword to it all day, even plan out what I’m going to wear while I’m experiencing it. I’m starving and it will fill me up, yet not satisfy me completely. That satisfaction, that cherry on top of that delicious plate of fried ice cream, is most definitely the Academy Awards. Well, that’s in a couple of weeks, so for now we get to savor that show that will prepare us for the big one. Hopefully, some of these people will take a second to reflect on the things that they wore. Women like <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Sandra-Bullock.jpg">Sandra Bullock</a> and <a href= "http://media.cleveland.com/moviebuff_impact/photo/mo-niquejpg-05384f4b02515055_medium.jpg">Mo’Nique</a> can sit back and gaze into their reflection staring back at them in their brand new trophies, thinking of how gorgeous they looked (not to mention send their stylists and hairdresser flowers). Then <a href= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/4438/slide_4438_62226_large.jpg">Drew Berrymore</a> (take off that awful fanny pack of sequins, then we'll talk) and <a href= "http://shunews.shudoo.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/kate-hudson.jpg">Kate Hudson</a> can look into their mirror or the “Worst Dressed” lists that have been generated and think about what they’ve done (those stylists get time outs. Hairstylists did OK.). In a couple of weeks, you can redeem yourselves. Until then, this is what I thought of a few of their peers.<br />
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She wanted the attention, so let’s give it to her. <a href= "http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/01/18/article-1244083-07E6660B000005DC-870_306x727.jpg">Mariah Carey</a> looked like an escort that someone was taking to a steak house. I’m over her and her ghetto fabulous, revealing, over the top ensembles. Everyone is obsessed with how she looks in Precious and it’s (to sat the least) bugging the shit out of me. Who is talking about her actual <i>performance</i>? Nobody. All people can talk about is how the world’s biggest diva took off her makeup to play a role. Big deal. It’s called acting. <br />
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Ladies and Gentlemen, <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Cher.jpg">Cher</a>. <a href= "http://cdn3.ioffer.com/img/item/623/069/61/o_2tTVAQCIIJrj9sE.jpg">Paul Stanley.</a> <a href= "http://images.jamsbio.com/images/xyz/cher.jpg">Cher.</a> <a href= "http://images.thegauntlet.com/pics/paulstanley.jpg">Paul Stanley.</a> /End.<br />
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How thrilled was I, by the way, at <a href= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/01/amy-adams-golden-globes.jpg">Amy Adams</a> and <a href= "http://www.newsgab.com/forum/attachments/celebrity-pictures/234484d1263827088-kristen-bell-white-dress-2010-golden-globe-awards-1-17-10-kb02.jpg">Kristen Bell</a> rocked short dresses? While Amy Adams had the cutest maternity dress I’ve seen in a while (See: <a href= "http://farm1.static.flickr.com/35/111581282_e28e759a80.jpg">Rachel Weisz</a> at the 2006 Oscars), Kristen Bell looked fun and comfortable.<br />
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After looking at a lot of pictures, I’m wondering how many boys helped pick out their wives’ and girlfriends’ dresses. <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/content/uploads/2010/01/golden-globe-awards-67-cleavage-anna-paquin.jpg">Anna Paquin</a> looked amazing, I’m sure double stick tape was her best friend for the night. Did <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/content/uploads/2010/01/golden-globe-awards-67-cleavage-christina-aguilera.jpg">Christina Aguliera’s</a> boob pop out? No, wait. That was just a poor color choice for your skin tone. My bad. Oh and thanks a lot, <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/content/uploads/2010/01/golden-globe-awards-67-cleavage-christina-hendricks.jpg">Christina Hendricks</a>. Like my boyfriend needed another excuse to stare at you. Juuust kidding. You're pretty.<br />
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Really, <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Zoe-Saldana.jpg">Zoe Saldana</a>? What the hell, dude? You’re so cute, have an amazing body, your hair looked flawless. Why then, would you overshadow everything with that disgusting raisin dress? It’s a big, blowsy, wrinkled comforter. There are ruffles where there shouldn’t be, weird flap things missing like redneck teeth, and weird, splotty, gross-- you know what? I won’t waste any more time talking about this mess. And check out Hot Topic on the left. Who brought that guy? <br />
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<b>As for boys:</b> Oh hey, <a href= "http://cdn.sheknows.com/articles/golden-globes-2010-robert-downey-jr.jpg">Robert Downey, Jr</a>. Like ladies needed a reminder of how awesome you look in a tux. The guy's certainly didn't need a refresher of how badass you are. I feel like he didn’t wear a tie not because a stylist told him not to, but because he didn’t feel like it. And he can do that. You know why? Because he’s fucking Robert Downey, Jr. That’s why.<br />
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Speaking of badasses, there are two that I have to mention. Way to bring back velour, <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-Samuel-Jackson.jpg">Sam Jackson</a>. How the hell did he pull this off? Probably the same way that <a href= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/4438/slide_4438_62225_large.jpg">Mickey Rourke</a> pulled off his Crocodile Dundee lapels. Awesome. (Love his lady friend's fantastic dress!)<br />
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Sup, <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Mark-Wahlberg.jpg">Mark Wahlberg</a>? You’re keepin' it classic, I like that. I like your tux. You've got a bottle of water, good thing. It's hot in California. Say hello to your mother for me.<br />
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I don’t know what’s going on with <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-Tracy-Morgan.jpg">Tracy Morgan</a>, but I’m digging the fact that his umbrella matches his pocket square. Somebody's ready to party.<br />
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It is no secret how much I despise the “Twilight” franchise. That’s why my like for <a href= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Taylor-Lautner.jpg">Taylor Lautner</a> is shocking even me. Out of everyone (yes, I’m even talking to you, Anna Kendrick. Ride that Clooney train as long as you can.) The kid knows how to dress. Everything is tailored, his hair is always styled, he always looks healthy too, which is a hell of a lot more than I can say for the rest of that cast of hooligans. Hi five, Michigan native!<br />
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Best dressed goes to:<br />
<img src= "http://www.hiphoprx.com/wp-content/gallery/00-single/Golden-Globe-Awards-picture-Jennifer-Aniston.jpg"><br />
Jennifer Aniston. Simple jewelry, hair, and shoes. I hope when I’m in my forties, my legs look that good to wear a slit that high. Kristen Bell was a very, very close second, but I could have done without the <a href= "http://www.newsgab.com/forum/attachments/celebrity-pictures/234485d1263827088-kristen-bell-white-dress-2010-golden-globe-awards-1-17-10-kb03.jpg">Claire’s necklace</a>. Yes, even you’re laughing at that cheap looking choker.<br />
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And <br />
<img src= "http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2010/01/robert-dowey-jr-wins-golden-globe-best-actor.jpg"><br />
Robert Downey, Jr. Fuck ties.<br />
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Worst dressed goes to<br />
<img src= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gen/133765/TINA-FEY.jpg"><br />
So Tina Fey, how does Helena Bonham Carter feel about <a href= "http://images.usatoday.com/life/_photos/2008/01/03/todd-carterx.jpg">you stealing her wardrobe from “Sweeny Todd”</a>? Colleen Atwood is piiiiissed!<br />
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And <br />
<img src= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/4438/slide_4438_62221_large.jpg"><br />
Quentin Tarantino. Why are you wearing a belly chain? You seem like a cool guy! I like your movies! Just because you have a cult following does not mean you can dress any way you want! Only Mickey Rourke can do that!<br />
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The Not-Appropriate-For-The-Night-But-Awesome-Anyway Award goes to Ms. Lindsay Lohan. <br />
<img src= "http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gen/133826/LINDSAY-LOHAN.jpg"><br />
Nice attempt, yet not quite hitting the mark. Kinda like her career. (OOOOOOOH!)Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-79114560859057950962010-01-05T20:48:00.000-08:002010-01-05T20:48:51.617-08:00Hey cold weather: STFUI’m freezing. It’s cold outside, I’m wearing layers of clothes, and I’m freezing and I’m pissed off. Let me explain. Lately, (and by <i>lately</i>, of course, I mean <i>the past couple of weeks</i>) I haven’t updated because I’ve been feeling a lack of inspiration. What the hell should I write about? There have been the people I’ve observed at shows, the people who’s hair I’ve cut, the people I’ve seen on reality shows. Something hit me the other day though: I’m fucking pissed off . Oh? You’re asking why? I’ll tell you. It’s January. I’m cold. I wore a dress on New Year’s Eve. I also wore a dress on Christmas Eve. Homegirl got wise and wore pants New Year’s day and Christmas day, though. Tights can only keep you so warm, and I’ve worn my black boots like crazy. <br />
While I had been feeling uninspired I was looking at the most fun new website ever, called Chictopia. It is just a very, very long gallery full of people wearing fantastic outfits and posting them. Well, while looking at this, I see pictures like <a href= "http://assets0.chictopia.com/photos/nancyalexandria/4228098522/4924573253/gray-f21-sweater-black-h-m-skirt-black-vintage-boots-brown-h-m-sunglasses-_400.jpg?597463">this</a>. Or <a href= "http://images3.chictopia.com/photos/DigitalLove/5842630811/pink-gap-cardigan-white-topshop-skirt-white-topshop-black-george-boots_400.jpg">this</a>. Or even <a href= "http://images3.chictopia.com/photos/meowsk/6458059327/gold-urban-outfitters-accessories-beige-lux-uo-cardigan-blue-kimchi-blue-dre_400.jpg">this</a>. What the hell? Does this website know that while I’m looking at these pictures I’m currently wearing knee socks, pj pants, a tank top, a tshirt, a hoodie, and a Snuggie? Seeing pictures of the amazing sun shining and people in short sleeves is making me sick. <br />
Look, believe it or not, I normally like the wintertime. I do! I was born in December, for cryin’ out loud. Snow is gorgeous to look at, but only if it’s going hand in hand with Christmas lights. I like my birthday, Christmas and New Year’s parties. I also like dresses, sunglasses, and tshirts. Short sleeves and hemlines weren’t designed for girls who live in Michigan. We get those three months out of the 12 month year. This makes (doing the math) nine months of coats, gloves, long sleeves and hats. Nine months! A human grows in that amount of time! That’s so long! <br />
This was brought to my attention last Sunday. Being the girlfriend of an avid toy collector, we have days where we go around town going to various stores looking for these toys. (It’s actually kind of fun. While he browses looking for a variant of someone to make a build-a-figure of someone else who looks like Manbearpig, I get to go around pressing buttons and making “Fur-Real” animals bark at me.) I was digging through my dresser wondering what t-shirt to wear on my day off and it hit me: nobody cares. Know why? Nobody can fucking see it. For all everyone knows, I can have a giant swastika plastered across my chest. You can’t see it under my hoodie and coat. January (and February, and March, and April, and a good chunk of May) always means my big black pea coat, gloves and even sometimes my hat. Always jeans, always boots (oh no, Converse are saved for those days where the sun melts the snow off of the concrete. And forget about those awesome ballet flats that I got that have a FLOWER made out of a ZIPPER. It’s too cold for those.), always sadness. <br />
So I guess my point to writing this was to make a plea to months January, February, March, April, and that good chunk of May Please be kind to us. Remember how amazing June, July, and August were? I understand there needs to be a blizzard of some kind, but let’s leave that behind and kick this whole Global Warming thing into high gear. I’d like to even wear a pair of jeans, hoodie and (gasp!) those super cool ZIPPER FLOWER ballet flats. <br />
Sorry, Al Gore. I’ll take my winter with a side of sunshine and a dash of “unseasonable conditions”. As long as it’s in the name of cute clothes, right?Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-5966708194152711792009-12-06T21:06:00.000-08:002010-01-05T20:59:29.721-08:00Top 5.One of the best compliments I've ever gotten was from a friend of mine at one of her shows. I was wearing my <a href= "http://photos-b.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs035.snc1/2414_742648733843_2240099_47247622_1548_n.jpg">"Superhero" outfit</a>. She said "I wish I had the balls to pull off the crazy things you do." After thanking her (that's one hell of a compliment!), I started to think. Was what I was wearing crazy or was it out of the ordinary? There is a difference. <br />
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To be “stylish” one has to have people to copy. There are the typical ones, the Audrey Hepburns, the Sarah Jessica Parkers, even the Lady GaGas. I’m not denying someone like Marliyn Monroe, the woman that the world associates with timeless beauty, isn’t on my list. These aren’t people who have style-- it’s people who I personally love.<br />
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So, after thinking about it for days and days, I have narrowed it down to my TOP 5 STYLE ICONS. This is in no particular order in any way. <br />
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<img src= "http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/zooey.png"> <br />
1. <b>Zooey Deschanel</b>: Besides being featured at the very top of this page (looking like a fantastic pinup), Zooey Deschanel is one of the people I try to copy the most (maybe this is in order after all?). Her hair hasn't changed in years and that's not a bad thing-- she's found a style who works for her. (Problem? Also see Brooke Shields: also been rocking the same 'do since the 80s.) She has made big bangs, simple eye makeup and cardigans cool again. This picture is from an awesome short film she did with Joseph Gordon-Levitt who co-stars in the movie <i>(500)Days of Summer</i> with her. Marc Webb, who also directed that movie, directed the little video where the two of them dance around in amazing outfits, making all of us jealous that we aren't as talented or as well dressed as those two (um... there's really more to it than that). Check out <a href= "http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2307295488/nm0221046">her entire wardrobe</a> for <i>(500) Days of Summer</i>. You’ll be blown away! <br />
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<img src= "http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/jessalexander_/kn.png"><br />
2. <b>Kate Nash</b>: In my entire life I have never seen anyone use color like she does. Patterned dresses? Check. Big, 60’s hair? Check. Adorable flats with bright tights? Check and check. Super daring, super cute, and always has a smile on her face. (If we’ve learned anything from Annie and Daddy Warbucks, you’re never fully dressed without it!) It took me some convincing, but my love of flats stems from Kate Nash. Ask anyone I work with, that's all I wear to work. (I will be touching on this in the future, but even as a girl who loves her some cute heels, how the hell can women wear them for an eight hour shift? High five, Victoria Beckham!) In her video for “Caroline’s a Victim”, she’s rocking about five colors in one outfit. I highly suggest not only watching it, but checking out some of her music as well. Kate Nash is British and adorable. It is still a mystery to me why this girl isn’t bigger in the US. We need to be best friends so we could share clothes.<br />
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3. <b>Jared Leto</b>: You may be asking yourself “Jared Leto now… or 1990s?” Now. I currently sport the black fingerless gloves and -yes- even the swoopy side bangs. The front man for the band 30 Seconds to Mars has an album coming out on Tuesday, and I’ll be seeing the entire band in a couple of weeks. You can bet your ass that on Thursday (at Avatar-- your welcome Michael) whatever I’ll be wearing will be some sort of outfit inspired by what he’ll be wearing on stage. The video for “Kings and Queens” is on YouTube, and that, my friends, is flat out eye candy. He wears black like he thinks he's Johnny Cash but will always add a little touch of color (accident? The “splash” Stacey and London are always talking about? You decide.) to help break everything up. Plus, he’s hot.<br />
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4. <b>Hayley Williams</b>: Oh, Hayley Williams. This girl is like a queen to every teenage girl (and even some of us out of high school). I’ve been told on some occasions that I look like her, and always taking it as a compliment, I think it’s less about looks and more about style. We have the same hair (a shorter version of the Jared Leto indie man bang), the same gap tooth, we’re both short (I’m 3 inches taller! 5’6 FTW!), but I must say, I copy the girl’s clothes. Was it my love of stripes that drew me to the singer of Paramore, or has my love of Paramore brought out my love of stripes? Am I a victim of the “scene”? Or is it a coincidence? Whatever the case may be, love her, love Paramore, lets be friends.<br />
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5. <b>Sheri Moon Zombie</b>: This woman is living the life that I want. Actress. Designer. Los Angeles resident. Married to Rob Zombie. Having her own clothing line, she gets to pretty much wear whatever the hell she wants, whenever the hell she wants. I started wearing aviators because of Sheri Moon. (Yes, Sarah Connor rocks the hell out of the pair she’s wearing in “Terminator 2”, I’m not denying that) Bordering between seventies badass and modern day rock goddess, she has made fashion her bitch. Thank you, thank you, thank you. It is no secret how much I love her clothes: <a href= "http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v2618/138/9/2240099/n2240099_47631981_4067031.jpg"> Exihbit A</a>. <a href= "http://photos-e.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs161.snc1/6015_913921856133_2240099_50763988_6411286_n.jpg"> Exhibit B</a>. How nerdy am I by the way, currently wearing one of those hoodies while I’m typing this? By the way bitch needs to play Harley Quinn in a Batman movie. (Tell me I’m wrong!) Dear Sheri Moon: may I work for you? You can pay me in clothes. I promise.<br />
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Now that I have the ability to receive comments, I'd like to know who inspires you the most!Jess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6886080893900847034.post-57931225217678014062009-12-03T23:32:00.000-08:002010-01-23T23:36:02.592-08:00First.I’m writing a blog.<br />
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More specifically, a blog about fashion. I love clothes. I look at clothing websites like sixteen year old boys look at porn. Ball gowns, metallic leggings, ripped up t-shirts, vintage jewelry, even bizarre hair extensions; all of this is art to me. Words can’t express the excitement and overall giddiness that shoots its way through my body when I witness someone’s amazing ability to pair bright tights with insane heels, a bedazzled (oh yeah- I totally said “bedazzled”) jacket, then top it off with an amazing head of hair. Hell, Bravo thought fashion was so interesting they made a show out of it. (Big ups to Lifetime for bagging Project Runway, even though this last season was a snooze fest. Please, Mean-a Irena being crowned the winner after all of her shit looking the same? Stop kidding yourselves, we all know the real winner was Ms. Althea. And yes, I was in fact shooting for Althea. Tim Gunn smiled and sashayed his way through this season with impeccable grace and more sass than ever- that isn‘t an issue.)<br />
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I don’t know what first drew me to the fashion industry in general. Maybe it’s that year I spent in cosmetology school. Maybe it’s the fact that I come from a small town where everyone dressed the same. (You did if you knew what was good for you. Wear something that was slightly arty or nerdy and you’ll not only get your ass kicked, they may ask you to change. I’m not kidding, I’ve seen it happen.) I just love looking at people and wondering why the hell they have on what they actually have on.<br />
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My boyfriend of almost four years plays bass in the band Ghosts of the Great Lakes. One of my favorite past times is going to those shows, sitting at the merch table and just watching. Watching everyone. When Mike has band duties, my other favorite person to stare with would be my gorgeous friend Nik. Also being a band lady friend, she gets the honor of arriving to said shows early with yours truly. Nik will sit (dressed to the nines, might I add) in these random smoky, sometimes sleezy, always hipster and trash-filled bars and just watch with me. Everyone does it. Mike has gotten to the point where he will be able to spot a cool pair of shoes from across the room. (Jealous? I know you are.) It’s fun. Try it.<br />
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That’s when it hit me: everyone, no matter who they are, plans what they’re wearing. My mom, your sister, those cool old people who you want to be your grandparents, your weird co-worker, that mail man that mumbles to himself, the rock star you bump in to at a show. They wore those shirts, that ponytail, that pair of boots for a reason. In fact, there is a reason you’re wearing what you’re wearing right now. It’s cold outside, so I assume you’re wearing socks. Why are you wearing those particular socks? I enjoy the rainbow striped knee socks I currently have on, they’re thick and comfy as all get out. My jeans (Converse for Target, might I add) are dark and well fitted; add to that my Chucks and Suicide Girl hoodie, and you’ll have a clear indication that I wasn’t feeling too daring today. I kept it safe. No patterned skirts, bright tights or knee high sneakers today.<br />
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So enjoy. Check back often. I like to talk, post pretty things to look at, and I promise to be well dressed as I do it.<br />
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-jessJess Alexanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10639673493467697664noreply@blogger.com0